No, not my wedding… I was just a guest.
I bragged a while ago about purchasing a dress for AJ’s sister’s wedding nice and early so I didn’t have to stress about trying to lose weight or doing a frantic shopping centre dash at the last minute. Been there, done that.
I didn’t give it much thought until a few days before the wedding when I tried on the dress and announced that I don’t really like it that much anymore. Sigh. I didn’t exactly hate it, it just isn’t 100% what I would have chosen if I had all size options available to me. Oh well, too late now, suck it up.
I made it work anyway and was happy with how it came together in the end. I only had 30 minutes to get ready because we spent the day racing around setting up the venue. So it was a mad rush, but we made it to the church on time (anyone would think I was the one getting married).
I wish I had more reasons to get dressed up, so if you’re getting married, please invite me. I will drink way too much and make a fool of myself though.
I did something completely crazy and out of character for me last week. I bought a dress in a size that actually fits me right now. Not a dress that will fit me when I lose weight. It actually fits me today. See, crazy!
Even more unbelievable is that it is a dress to wear to a wedding in 2 months. The old me would have pledged to lose 5 kilos before this wedding and buy a dress in a size too small as ‘motivation’. Then on the night before the wedding I would be hyperventilating in a change room and hating myself for being so fat and undisciplined and spend way too much money on a dress I could barely tolerate. Oh the memories…
So this is the dress. It is a bit glitzy, but the wedding is on a Friday night, so hopefully I can get away with it. I just need to add a spray tan, some red lippy and strappy heels and I am good to go.
I actually ordered 5 dresses from ASOS, all in size 18, and only 2 fit me (the others were way too small god damn it). I was restricted for choice because I had to buy something that was loose around my back, as I have some major lumps and bumps that stand out after my body lift surgery a few years ago. I am also pretty self conscious of my arms so I wanted a sleeve of some sort. And, lastly, I wanted to actually like it and feel like it reflected my style a little bit. I think I succeeded.
So here is to a year of loving myself enough to only buy clothes that actually fit me. I am sure my wardrobe will thank me.